Fear of coming out

I have a fear of coming out to my family. The funny thing is I usually have no problem telling strangers or most friends that I am an atheist. I have told a couple people at work and some of my friends know. I think this is the fear of the unknown, the fear that what we don't know is infinitely worse than what we do. I can't say for certain that telling my parents will have any negative repercussions. I think that my dad wouldn't care all that much, my mom is a different matter, she is heavily entrenched within her church. Sometimes I even go with her when I am in town to see the people I grew up with. My inlaws are a different matter, while my father in law is really quiet, he is very religious, my mother in law is very vocal and petty. I know that if they found out there would be some consequences. I don't know what nor do I want to find out. I don't know...So far coming out to my wife has been the toughest leap so far. We never really discussed religion all that much before hand (only in the context of future kids and private/public school). I am glad that I came out to her... it allows me to be who I am with absolutely no pretext.

I still tend to hold onto my truth pretty closely, today I was helping my neighbor and her girls build a snowman, we were talking about christmas traditions. (I already knew they go to church every sunday) I said that growing up we would go to church on xmas eve then come home and make tacos. I told her that we didn't go to church, that I was raised episcopalian while my wife is catholic.

Ive noticed in writing this that I tend to use language carefully, "I was raised" points to the past and says nothing about current beliefs. These thoughts tend to weigh heavily on me, especially around this time of the year.